Recently when some Hindoo youths attacked few youths in a homestay in Mangalore, all hell broke loose. The "secularists" were outraged and attacked this "attack" in all platforms - newspapers, television, blogs, interviews, discussions, facebook, twitter....!! And they didn't forget to condemn the "Hindoo Fundamentalism" and "communalism".
Look at the following picture, which clearly shows that Muslims are attacking a Buddha statue. Now, where are our "Secularists"!? Or may be they want this to continue......because what these Muslim youths are doing is nothing but "Secularism"!!
Or whatever Hindoo's does is communal and whatever a Muslim does is "Secular"!!
In India arranged marriages are part of the Hindu
tradition and also culture. But, we cannot say love marriages are banned or
looked down in Hindus. Marriage of Krishna and Rukmini was a love marriage.
Marriage of dushyanta and shakuntala was a love marriage - our country got
the name Bharat from their son!
We had many different types of marriages and all
were accepted by the society. Love marriage was also called as "Gandharva
Vivaha". Also, there was swayamvara - this also is not considered as
arranged marriage. But, all these were mainly practiced by kings and their
Today, girls are also getting formal education just
like boys. After that they are also seeking a career and go out to work. So,
chances of boys meeting girls is more today than ever before. So, it is very
natural for a boy to get attracted to a girl and vice-versa. This is leading to
more love marriages now-a-days.
The main problem that comes in the ways of love
marriage is the caste and family tradition. Slowly the society is starting to
accept inter-caste marriages and that would reduce the caste-ism,
untouchability, etc, which are plaguing Hindu society for more than a century.
I see this as a positive outcome of love marriage. But, the biggest problem
with love marriage is the love itself. The boy and girl would have got
attracted to each other and this they think as love. This attractions blinds
their mind and they forget the ground realities. So, chances of them committing
mistake and repent later is more. But, realizing the mistake later is going to
cost the life itself. Girls are more emotional and they goto the extreme step
of taking out the life itself in the end!
India's foremost contribution to the world is
"Family System". Marriage is a very important aspect of this system.
The young couple should realize this. Marriage is not just about a girl and boy
coming together; It is about building a family.
So, whether it is a arranged marriage or a love
marriage, the most important thing is how they live after the marriage; how is
their family life? Living together in a family for life-long needs lot of
sacrifice - both husband and wife have to sacrifice lot of things. The foremost
thing that they need to sacrifice is their ego. If this is not done, whatever
kind of marriage it doesn't matter - they will fail.
When we talk about love marriages, people
immediately draw our attention to the fact that many of them lead to divorce.
But, I have witnessed many love marriages (in-fact most of the marriages
happening today are all love marriages) and majority of them are leading a good
life. Also, I have witnessed failed arranged marriages. So, given this
background, the conclusion that I make is that, it doesn't matter what kind of
marriage is yours - the only thing matters is, how is your life after that.